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Hi, I'm Mak. I'm a leadership coach for new managers who knows what it's like to be filled with overwhelm, self-doubt and terror that I’d let everyone down. My Story
Do you think your team should respect you because they HAVE to? Or rather do you feel as though this is the kind of thing that you have to earn over time?
​I’m going to assume you agree with the second one 🙂
Unfortunately some managers think that they should automatically be respected because of their position when that’s not the case.
The truth is in order to truly be respected you have to work really hard at it and it’s the micro actions that you put forth every day that makes the difference.
In today’s episode of Mak TV I’m sharing some of the signs that your team doesn’t respect you as their manager and what you can do specifically to turn the beat around on that one.
Would you prefer to read rather than watch? Not to worry! You can read the blog post below.
But first, to really help you stand out in your new role I highly recommend downloading The Ultimate Guide to Being an Effective Team Leader. A free downloadable interactive guide to help you show up and stand out and take the right action steps.
If your team is late in reaching department deadlines, constantly late, or they’re telling you what they will and will not do….. then it’s most likely because they don’t take you seriously in the role
So much of our communication comes through non verbal cues and it’s usually the thing that’s hardest to hide.
So they might not say it but chances are they are definitely giving off how they feel through their body language.
They might never smile in your presence, they might not really make solid eye contact with you or every time they talk to you arms are crossed in a very distant way.
You come in in the morning and they would rather have their heads buried in anything else but having to talk to you.
I know of some team members that have said they dislike their manager so much that they would rather send them an email than having to speak to them. That’s not good for obvious reasons.
If you have team members that are constantly calling in sick chances are they might just not want to be around you and are looking for another job with a much better manager.
If you’re saying as the manager, why didn’t anyone tell me or why am I only finding this out now? There’s a reason, and it’s because they either don’t want to talk to you or they don’t see the need to keep you informed. Both really a sign of disrespect.
So what do you do if you have a team that just doesn’t respect you? Can you turn the ship around? I say absolutely yes!
Here are a few tips you can do to turn things around:
If you want your team to respect you and the role that they have – then you have to do the same. Take your job seriously.
You can’t blame a group of people for not taking their jobs seriously when you continue to wing what you do every day. Particularly if you’re a new manager.
I mean they can see your lack of confidence, your hesitation, your mistakes and that things aren’t getting better which means they know you’re not taking it seriously.
So I’m going to say it over and over again – stop winging it and get yourself trained so that you can step forward with the proper skills and lead the team properly.
One of the things that breaks down trust and respect in a leader is when they point the blame on their team when things go wrong but will happily accept praise when the team does something great.
I used to have a private Facebook group and to enter the group you have to answer a couple qualified questions so I can make sure that you’re serious about learning.
One of the questions I had was, what do you struggle with most as a leader?
Someone actually wrote: I struggle with the incompetence from my team.
I mean that is such a messed up attitude and I gotta tell you the one thing about leadership that is always true is that any failure is actually on you.
Whether you failed to train, coach, have the difficult conversation or fire too late – those are all your choices.
Any failure in the part of the team is actually on you and not your team. So if you find yourself pointing the finger outward you gotta stop immediately because that for sure eats away at respect.
Managers that care only about the work and the results are looked at as people that care only about themselves and as a result employees care only about themselves.
It becomes every person for themselves at work and so you have to aim to build a good relationship with each person.
Now if you are starting from a place where there is already low respect this is going to take some time but it can be done with consistent micro efforts starting with you.
One of the things that irks employees is when a manager is inconsistent and changes the goal post on their team constantly or treats certain members of the team better than others.
That’s a recipe for disaster!
In all your decisions, feedback, or praise make sure that it’s always fair and consistent.
This is one of the things you will hear me repeat over and over again because this is the area that so many managers fail to do properly and then they wonder why people don’t know what to do or are constantly hitting goals.
If you don’t have proper deadlines then you can expect that they will be missed.
If you don’t set expectations on behaviors then you can expect that behaviors will just decline.
You have to do the work up front of providing people with guidelines and clear expectations so that they can rise to them.
Don’t expect people to know what to do.
The great thing about setting clear expectations is that people start to see you as someone that is actually leading the team rather than someone that just has a title for title sake.
July 27, 2021