Updated December 31st, 2024

Congratulations on stepping into your leadership! As a first-time leader, you’re not just managing tasks; you’re building experiences, fostering growth, and inspiring others. But here’s the catch: there’s a big difference between being a life-changing leader and a mediocre manager.

Life-changing leaders leave their mark by building trust, empowering their team members, and driving positive change. Mediocre managers? They get stuck in the weeds and focus only on checking boxes and maintaining the status quo.

But here’s the good news: The choice is yours, and in today’s blog post, we’ll break down the traits that separate truly impactful leaders from those who just manage.

But first, to help you stand out in your new role, sign up for my FREE class, How to Become an Effective Leader so You Can Build a High-Performance Team, here !

Life-Changing Leaders vs Mediocre Managers

One of the most frequently asked questions we hear in leadership is: “Is a leader born or made?” You will be surprised to know the answer is quite simple.

While, yes, some people have natural leadership traits, which you can identify from early on, a true leader can be developed to reach their full potential. In fact, according to the Harvard Business Review, leaders intentionally put themselves in situations where they have to learn, adapt, and grow to develop the tenacity and fortitude to motivate and guide others.

Since we’re already addressing the common myths in leadership, here are a couple more we can debunk:

1. A leader is always liked by their team. False. Leadership implies that sometimes you won’t be liked, and people will, in fact, disagree with your actions. However, if you’re all about making an impact, which will get there in a second, they will understand the ‘why’ behind your decisions.
2. Leaders are always extroverted, right? In fact, as an introvert myself, I can guarantee this: true leaders just need effective management, communication, and empathy skills that are not directly connected to extrovert traits. So that’s a big NO. You can be an impactful leader and an introvert.
3. Leaders have all the answers. False. Effective leaders don’t have all the answers and are willing to ask for help, delegate, and rely on their other’s expertise. Leadership is about guiding others, not being a one-person encyclopedia.

So, a life-changing leader is all about growth, influence, and collaboration—not perfection or born-in traits.

Life-Changing Leaders

A Life-Changing Leader is defined by their character. They CHOSE to step into leadership knowing it’s not the easiest path, but (that it’s worth it). More importantly, they KEEP choosing it because Life-Changing Leadership is a commitment.

Impactful leaders:

• Want to do better.
• Treat people with respect & dignity.
• They don’t just do their job well; they feel good at the end of the day.
• They’re committed to learning & growing.

Mediocre Managers

Mediocre managers exist in the status quo – meaning they’re comfortable with how things are, so they’re not necessarily trying to do better, be better, or create better; they’re content modeling the behavior that exists around them. They view people as resources and treat them like so.

Other traits of a mediocre manager that have a negative impact on their team are:

The Trait	The Impact
Lack of Empathy	Leaders who fail to understand or care about their team’s needs gradually destroy trust, which eventually leads to decreased work satisfaction.
Poor Communication	When leaders don’t communicate their expectations in a clear and concise manner, the team misunderstands their instructions and guidelines, which impacts the team’s results and deliverables.
Micromanagement	Overcontrollers are no one’s favorite. These leaders tend to overstress their team members and make them doubt their own work when they should be doing the opposite.

If you’ve realized you’ve done one of these things, don’t be too hard on yourself! The great news is that you’re not a lost cause, and there are plenty of strategies you can follow to turn things around in your favor.

Here’s what you should do instead:

#1. Be Humble

You know, humility in leadership is not about being weak or passive—it’s really about being open to learning and having a desire to help and lift others up. When you’re humble, you put yourself in other people’s shoes; you become empathic and aware of other people’s needs.

Another great thing about being a humble leader is that humility promotes curiosity. A curious leader asks questions to find out more about a situation rather than jumping to conclusions that can damage the relationship with the team or put you in a tough spot.

So, instead of: “I don’t care why you were late to the meeting; it’s your responsibility to show up on time.” You can try: “I’m curious about why you were late to the meeting. Is there something going on you’d like to share with me?”

You see, a humble leader:

1. Promotes a positive, high-performing work environment.
2. Their team is all about trust, respect, and collaboration.
3. Has engaged and motivated employees who feel heard, valued, and supported.

#2. Practice Emotional Intelligence

I know this might be tricky for some, but being aware of your emotions, learning to handle them, and knowing the impact on others will help you lead your team in a better way. For instance, when you find yourself in a similar situation to the previous point, where a team member is late for an important meeting, choose to:

• Listen clearly without judgment. A key to achieving this is to put yourself in the other person’s shoes.
• Ask questions. Again, a curious leader is a humble leader, so ask questions that would help you get to the bottom of the problem or root cause. For example: “I’m sorry you’re having trouble with your car, making you late to our meetings. What’s your plan for the upcoming meetings?”
• Communicate your expectations. While yes, it’s your job to be empathic, being a leader also involves strategically communicating your expectations, so in that conversation, try to keep it cool while at the same time keeping your team accountable for their actions.

Look, emotional intelligence is a skill that’s developed every day, so be patient with yourself and gather the best tools for your leadership journey, such as a spot in my FREE class, How to Become an Effective Leader so You Can Build a High-Performance Team, here!

#3. Communicate Clearly

You know, sometimes, as leaders, our communication style seems a little like this:

Talking between the lines, using asynchronous communication- because that’s easier to face reality- assuming people understand the message without asking…you get my point.

If you want to become a life-changing leader rather than a mediocre manager, you need to develop communication skills. In my experience, communication as a leader gets easier when you:

• Plan your communications. When, what, why, and where will you communicate? These aspects will also help you determine how to communicate with your peeps.
• Ask for feedback. Avoid potential misunderstandings and assumptions by asking for feedback. Ask questions like: “How do you feel about that?” and “What are your questions regarding this task?” Try not to ask questions that will reduce the answer to a simple yes or no; instead, encourage your team to keep the conversation going.
• Document your agreements. After the communication has taken place with your team, write down the agreements, to-dos, pending tasks, and points you will address in your next meetings.

Make sure you meet frequently, at least once a month, so you all are on the same page and avoid potential misunderstandings.

At the end of the day, anyone can make you a manager, but only you can make yourself a leader.

So now it’s time to ask yourself – which one are you?

If you’re looking to up-level your leadership capacity and become a life-changing leader, the best place to start is by watching my free training, where I walk you through the five pillars of my Elevate Team Performance Framework — the roadmap for becoming an effective leader who builds high-performing teams. Click here to sign up and watch it on demand for free!